Freakshow

Today was the start of second semester. I had three new sets of Pubic Speakers, and as of 8:30 this morning, two of those three sections were already filled to capacity--as in, I already had more students than desks.

Historically, the start of second semester doesn't go well for me. I'm entirely frazzled from wrapping up first semester and preparing for second semester in whiplash inducing turnaround time, and I'm mistakenly assuming that my new students will heart me as much as my old students did. Immediately. As in, they will walk in my room and will pick up where old kids left off, despite the fact that old kids didn't heart me right away either.

This generally leads to a lot of overcompensating by me--lots of jokes, lots of self-deprecation, lots of attempts to engage the newbs in the class and in my life. When this fails, as it always does, I begin to just talk about how weird the start of second semester is, how painful that they all don't know me yet, and I assure them that in 3-4 weeks time, they'll love me! They'll really love me!

I'd say the low point today was when I exclaimed that a sophomore boy (in a Public Speaking class dominated by huge, senior jock boys) was "so cute and little!"

To my benefit, I should point out that a girl from that same hour stopped at the door, turned to me and said, "I don't know you, but I want to BE you" on her way out. I'm going to guess she either didn't like the poor soph boy that I exclaimed over and was grateful for the total embarrassment I forced him to endure, or was entirely charmed by my freakshow song and dance today.

But "cute" and "little"?? Jesus! What was I thinking?!?